Sober and short kept notebook entries, piled up within a period of 40 years, are the starting point for a fragmented cinematic approach to an attitude to life. It brews, it nearly boils over, but the lid is solid on the pot. States of anxiety and trepidation are fought against with pills. War memories try to creep via dreams on the surface. A swallow flies inside through a window and Jürgen disappears in an earth hole.